Lenalee's Legs or Lavin goes Niezetche
by halfdelita
Summary: Lavin goes into lack-of-oxygen subspace and fantasises about LenaLee's legs - - who doesnt


_**Timphany's Song**_

_King Arthur, Bart and Gambino are having tea and discussing Telemachus and Agamemnon, when Allen Walker is sent crashing into the room, shattering wall and window alike. Timphany flutters in worriedly after him. He slammed hard into the Myrtaceae tree encircled with red brick in the middle of the room and moaned. Dislodged leaves were sent spiralling higher and higher in the cool breeze from the teenager-sized hole, and the threesome looked about in surprise. The Earl of the Millenium floated in on his Marry-Poppin's umbrella hot on his tail, showing his teeth. They both drew at the same time and Arthur, H.S, Gambino froze._

Kanda sheathed his six Illusions Mugen and Lavi put away his Iron Hammer Tessen. Both were sweating profusely from the vicious sparring match they had. It had started out relatively mild, but LenaLee had come to watch, balancing on one leg against the low stone wall and well... the guy-testerone fueled rivalry for the pretty 16 year old exorcist's attention had gone out of control. Kanda had a panda's black eye and reddish-blue bruises all over, while Lavi was dripping blood from his multiple cut wounds on his nose and wrists, but both were grinning as they shared a quick fierce hug which marked the end of the match and that their friendship was stronger than ever. Like teenagers after a particularly intense rugby match, they were grinning widely, even the oft-seen as cold and detached heartless Kanda. They sat back to back, sweaty and smelly clothes sticking to each other as they pondered the mysteries of the universe, as guys do after hyperventilating from overexertion.

"Say Kanda, do you think there's really a God out there who made the Ancient Family and Innocence, just so that he could watch sparks fly between us?"

"Nah. There isn't a God. If there were he wouldn't have let the Akumas kill so many people."

"Well I think there is. I think God is Light, and he delights in going in and out of the globe, which is the earth, and causing himself to be manifested in different colours at different strobing speeds..."

"You're thinking Disco lights Lavi... Fantasising about LenaLee's slender legs again?" Kanda teased. "She might just dance with you if you ask her out you know... if i don't get to her first."

"Nah, General Cross will kill us. Slowly."

They both shuddered.

Meanwhile elsewhere General Cross sneezed and rubbed his nose. He was thinking about how to get rid of his pesky disciple so he could focus his considerable charms on the slender lovely LinaLee, perhaps date her to a disco so he could see her wriggle. He whistled. Timphany zoomed to his side! Cupping his hands, he whispered something in its ear. Timphany bobbed up and down to show its understanding and fluttered off to find Walker and act as decoy.

"Timphany!" Allen Walker hugged the little winged ball eagerly as he spotted it!

"How's old man Cross and the crew?"

Timphany bobbed vigorously to show they were alright.

"Did he send you? More scores to memorise? Shucks! We went up to page 7 and 8 yesterday.. Page 9 today?" He sighed in mock exasperation. "Very well.. Let's get started. I did so want to bring LenaLee to Disco..."

Meanwhile LenaLee covered her mouth and sneezed as she was cornered by General Cross who was leaning really close, putting his palm on the wall right beside her head and tilting her chin up with his other rugged hand. Really close. Uncomfortably close. A bead of persperation formed on her forehead as she turned her head to the side and bent her knees to get escape his gaze. She felt against the wall for an escape route, even so feeling his eyes boring into her skull.

Suddenly Kuraudo appeared and hollering "Oh no you don't!" "Lau Jimin!" She commanded and the parasatic monkey at her shoulder expanded in size and gith and shot towards General Cross, and began pounding him with twin fists of energy! LenaLee shot a grateful glance at the only female general in the Order, ducked under the general's toned arm and fled!

General Cross pretended to sigh as he fought the monkey off. "Down boy! You know me!" The monkey hugged his leg lovingly and nuzzled. He laughingly mock-glares at Kuraudo. "Did you -have- to spoil my fun?" Cross recovers from his disappointment quickly advances on her amorously with a slight grin. "You'll just have to make up for it won't you?"

Kuraudo did and doubletake, momentarily rendered speechless by his sheer audacity. She spun half a circle on her heels and clapped for the monkey to return to her shoulder and stalked off, seething... After taking a dozen steps steps, she turned and clapped. Fo appeared out of the wall - Fo was guardian of the Asian HQ after all. She put her hands together and humbly bowed in respect to both Generals and cheekily pinched the monkey's red behind. It shrieked shrilly and swiped at her. Hurriedly putting her hands behind her head she enquired, "What can I do for you today?"

"General Cross is lonely and bluntly put, he needs some sharp female company." It was her turn to grin as she walked away without looking back.

"Understood!"

Fo turned both hands into living blades and stepping on the left and right walls, she somersaulted towards General Cross, put arms together and slashed down...

Cross quickdrew his anti-Akuma weapon, Judgement to block, and looking longingly in the direction of the long-gone LenaLee, and the receeding figure of Kuraudo (she did have such a nice sway to her hips as she walked) he sighed as he half heartedly shot at Fo a few times. Fo was a guardian with limitless stamina. He blocked a left swing to his face and countered, then another, and another...


End file.
